You would think change would be easy by now....

You might think that someone who has traveled to over 10 countries, slept on dirt floors in Africa, moved over twenty times in ten years would be a pro at change... this is simply not the case. I think as a young adult the wanderlust of life and adventure was fresh on my skipping steps and made the rapid changes in my life exciting... but the older I get the more i wish I had roots in one or two places. My closest friends are scattered around the world and my family, although only a day drive away,... is not just around the corner. Community is something to be celebrated and embraced and the loss of the closeness of those communities involves a grieving, at least for me. I realize now that all my previous moves, travels and adventures seemed far less daunting than the one I am currently embarked on. You see all the others had a time limit, I was there to accomplish a goal, or attend a school. All in all I have attended over five different colleges, and lived in Oregon, Washington, California, New Mexico, Idaho (previously for a few months), and Tanzania. But I knew all of those places were most likely temporary and kinda like a long vacation... therefore although I built great connections and made lifelong friends, the idea of a temporary place did not cause me to build a great attachment or want to stake out a homestead of sorts.

 The permanence of this particular move is scary. I know that now I am building a lifelong career and for the first time ever I will not have anything stored at my parents place, everything I own will be Uhauled across state lines and land in the cute duplex I am renting in Boise. Today I will sign papers with a 2.5 year contract, sign up for health and life insurance, arrange for utility companies to come to the house, get car insurance, and do all the adult things that I have been lucky enough to skirt around for the last ten years. This move, unlike all the others feels real and scary but also holds within it a sense of home that I haven't had in a long time.

Now don't get me wrong, I have loved and cherished my crazy adventurous life, all I have gotten to do and see and experience. I have fully lived my young life and I don't regret a moment of its crazy beauty, unforgettable storms, and even the painful stuff. I am who I am because of those moments. But now I think I am ready to change the shape and expression of my life to be less like a migrating bird and more like an Ent.... (a LOTR creature).

So if you are like me and adventure and change has been the rhythm of your life you might think I am crazy for turning in my wings for roots, but its my season to do this. I have amazing friends who may never choose the roots route, who in the core of their being are made for lifelong adventures, but I am also made for community. I believe we were created to need others, to innately crave a sense of community, although you are required to share your life with others can be daunting, but also extremely fulfilling. Now this does not mean that I will not have my moments of crazy amazing, where I get to continue to see the world and travel and taste adventure, the difference now is that I have a place to land, a safe and welcoming nest that is mine. It is still terrifying as it is unknown but I choose to fully embrace it.

So if you are one who has always had roots and were afraid of your wings- I challenge you to face that fear even in small steps to live out your dreams. One of my favorite people says this... "If you dreams do not scare you or are not above your ability level... you are not dreaming big enough"

If you are on the cover of National Geographic jumping off mountains or living in a hide for months- this article is most likely complete crap to you... but I would challenge you to find a home, a safe place that can hold part of your heart in the hands of your community and people you share your life with.

Both lives has their own unique beauty. What I am really saying is don't let Fear be a deciding force in anything you do or don't do. Faith, Hope, Love, Passions, Wisdom, and Courage are the foundations on which your dreams are built and can shine. I am still afraid of this great unknown but that fear will not be the voice I listen as I continue this new and unique adventure of building a home....

Thank you to all of who traveled with me on this crazy adventure of life, all though you are all over the world. I miss and love each of you.